The kids loved having J & S stay with us for a week. I must admit, the whole experience was easier than I thought it would be. The most difficult part was nighttime. They were all so excited to have someone new in their rooms, it was hard to squelch the talking. The first night, they all giggled until about 10PM. The second night, the boys were asleep by 9:30, but the girls had so exhausted themselves and each other that they were both awake until midnight, crying. It was almost scary how much S was like Hallie - hated being alone, talked in her sleep, woke crying in the night saying she was lonely or scared. And both very strong-willed, so while they enjoyed each other, they also clashed over control issues.
The first night, like I posted before, was a movie, some video games, and just hanging out, getting to know each other.
Since I'm not allowed to post pictures of the faces of foster kids, we're getting by this way... (I'll put in the real photos when I get my yearbook made.)
I called in "snow day" to J's school on Friday, since it said online it was snowing out there, and it was a 40 minute drive on a clear day. That night, it snowed here, too. So on their second morning with us (Saturday), the kids awoke to this...
Luckily, I'd planned ahead and picked up extra hats and gloves. Afterwards, J&S got to participate in our family traditions of hot chocolate whenever it snows (shown) and snow donuts, whenever the snow completely covers the ground.
Since there was still snow on the ground on Sunday, we didn't go to church (it involves us driving over a big, steep hill.) In some ways, I'll admit I was relieved. At our church, the kids sit in the service with us, and these kids, although generally very well behaved, had trouble sitting still and quiet during our advent reading, so I doubted church would have been successful. We actually held off our advent reading after the first attempt and did it when J&S were on visits with their birthparents, so it wouldn't be interrupted. They had visits scheduled with birthdad on Thursday and Monday, and with birthmom on Sunday and Tuesday. Busy schedule!
Monday we debated about school. There was a 2 hour delay in our district, a 1 hour delay in J's district, which told me the roads had some issues still (and Brian's car battery died Thursday night at work, so we are down to 1 vehicle for a while... getting it stuck in the snow somewhere was not a good prospect.) At the last minute, we decided to give it a try - and the first half block was the worst of it - pretty clear the whole way after that!
After school, he was picked up by the transporter, who then swung by our house to get S for a visit with their birthdad. They went to the mall, ate some McDonald's food (for the 3rd time that week on visits between the two parents), and he bought them both new shoes.
Tuesday we took J to school again, and S to daycare. The daycare lady informed me that S had to be there at least 3 days a week to "hold her spot", and since it was just 5 minutes from the school (and they were scheduled for a visit that afternoon), Tuesday seemed like it would be a good day for that.
By the time we got home from dropping everyone off Tuesday morning, we had a call from their foster mom - they were home early! Our kids were both very sad that they didn't get to say goodbye, so I let them write notes to tuck in their suitcase, that the foster mom picked up in the early afternoon.
It was a good experience overall, and we learned a few things...
1. A younger boy would be a better idea. J was just a year younger than Sam, and was noticably irritated by the sounds and movements (tics) that come with Asperger's. I think perhaps a younger (3 or 4 year old) boy would be wise... old enough to play with him, but young enough to get used to Sam's idiosyncrasies before he figured out it wasn't "normal."
2. Another "strong-willed" girl... would be a bad idea. Not that we'd want Hallie to trample anyone, either, but perhaps someone a little more meek than she is would be wise? If you know Hallie in real life, you know what I mean.
3. As far as foster placements go... I really like having an end in sight. So for now, we'll be sticking with respite care... unless maybe they call us about a baby. :)
Ultimately, it's up to God, of course, but these were our observations this weekend. Thanks to all who were praying for this experience. It was fun, educational, and hopefully those two kids were blessed by their time wish us.
